How was it, I wondered, as I awoke in middle of the Caribbean sea, did I end up sharing my cruise ship cabin on St Valentine’s Day with a six foot-long inflatable shark?

May be it was one too many rum cocktails at the swim-up bar at the fabulous Almond Casuarina Beach Resort in Barbados before boarding the ship.

Alternatively, could it be that I just took in too much sun while splashing around in the waves with my wife and two children on the pristine sands Barbados is rightly renowned for.

Either way, here I am on board P&O Cruises’ superliner Ventura about to dock in St Lucia celebrating Valentine’s Day and my daughter Tilly’s eighth birthday with a dolphin watching excursion followed by a special celebration tea and an extra special treat organised by the captain which involved a highly privileged visit to the bridge of the vast vessel.

So just where did the bright blue and white blow up shark come in? Now I remember. Tilly was given the massive plastic fish as an early birthday present to play with in the vast pool at the pre-cruise resort.

Inflation takes on new meaning

Happily, I got out of the breath-busting task of blowing up Sharkey thanks to two lovely ladies in the resort shop who adeptly pumped him up – no doubt the result of years of experience.

The next task was ensuring Sharkey’s safe passage on board Ventura – not the easiest of tasks for a fish out of water but happily the ship’s security staff were surprisingly understanding although squeezing him in the lift to go up tour cabin raised a few eyebrows amongst fellow passengers.

Sharkey is now taking a plunge in the cabin bathroom as we prepare to disembark in sunny St Lucia because the birthday girl doesn’t want him to scare off the dolphins she has been so excited about getting up to so close and personal.

The dolphins duly obliged in true Flipper-like fashion with multiple double flips and serious splashing to the delight of all concerned taking the somewhat choppy tour on Mike’s Dolphin and Whale Watching boat which came complete with plentiful offerings of rum punch for the adults to help them ease into Sunday lunchtime.

Encounters with a Great White

We are also getting ready to meet VIP chef Marco Pierre White who is making one of his regular appearances on board Ventura as part of his involvement with P&O Cruises. Marco oversees a speciality restaurant on the ship, funnily enough called the White Room.

I’m not sure what Marco would make of shark steaks, but I suspect he would show Sharkey little mercy in the galley, so it’s best that our inflatable friend stays put in his new waterborne home.

The great chef is on board to run a series of cookery master classes for passengers. And on this cruise, he is running his first cookery school for children, assisting youngsters in preparing tasty dishes to then surprise their parents with on their return to dry land.

Having escorted Sharkey on board and let him loose in the ship’s plunge pool – much to the horror of certain onlookers – the idea of encountering the Hell’s Kitchen chef seemed to somewhat pale in comparison.

Tilly, asserting her authority in a way parents of any eight year old will recognise, was typically immune to the Jaws-like impact Sharkey seemed to have when making his first, and I suspect final, public appearance.

To say that swimmers exited the pool rapidly would be an understatement, despite Sharkey quite obviously being entirely full of hot air.

It was only on return to our cabin did I realise that not only was the ship preparing for a massive formal Valentine’s night but also February 14 coincided with the Chinese new year of the Tiger.

At this stage I realised that the only sensible option to avoid getting Sharkey into the soup would be a let down for him. A deflating experience may be, but one that ensured the sanity of the rest of the passengers on board Ventura was maintained while Tilly excitedly trotted off to a wonderful birthday tea totally unawares of the fate of her new blow up buddy.

After all, there could only be room on board for one Great White.

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