Belay that yarn and board a cruise vessel

belay-that-yarn-and-board-a-cruise-vessel

Ahoy matey! There are thousands of nautical terms, many of which are still widely used today.

Now that you’re within ear-shot, I’ll spin you a yarn to give you a set of the wind and current.

There was I, an old hand at checking the barrels of port in the captain’s store-room when I heard a cry from Jack Robinson, the forecastle lookout,

‘On deck there! Breakers ahead!’

Son-of-a…

We were breaking a gale off the old country under a harvest moon and light breezes were on the horizon.

‘You son-of-a-gun,’ I yelled back through the porthole, off at a tangent, ‘I thought the ship was making a good land-fall and getting set to drop anchor. I almost dropped a bottle of the Captain’s special reserve instead.’

‘You’d better grin and bear it, Jimbo, you soused gurnet,’ replied the lookout. ‘We’ve got to heave about and haul around if we don’t want the ship to end up high-and-dry on the rocks of old Blighty.

‘Better a good land-fall than a bad ‘un. That’s why I keep a sharp look-out.’

Soused yet ship-shape

‘Oh well,’ I muttered to nobody in particular, ‘any port in a storm – or just after a gale.’

‘By the way, Jimbo,’ said Jack, ‘there’s a rainbow ahead, and you know what they say:

A rainbow towards night,
Fair weather in sight,
Rainbow at night,
Sailor’s delight;
Rainbow in the morning,
Sailors, take warning.

‘Talking of which, you sound like you’re shaking a cloth in the wind tonight…If you’re bit groggy from tasting the Captain’s port I’ll keep watch for you – as long as we share and share alike.

‘Thanks, matey,’ I whispered back, for the jolly Jack Tar was now leaning over the side of the deck right above the captain’s store-room port-hole.

‘Join me later on the quarterdeck, Jack, and we’ll splice the main brace, freshen your hawse and get tanked-up – hic! Down the hatch.’

James Leavey

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Posted in Humour

01 Jul 2011

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