A lot has been said in the past week about a return to Hi De Hi post-war, post-austerity British holiday camp holidays in 2009.
The lure of ‘good old fashioned family fun’ coupled with a squeeze on disposable income is apparently lifting demand for so-called retro holidays in the UK. The story, evocative of Carry on Camping, even made page three of the venerable Daily Telegraph before Easter.
But this for me conjures up images of down at heel holiday camps set in godforsaken, rain-swept bits of resorts that no-one else would dare set foot in with horrific chalet accommodation and holidaymakers fed on a menu of disgusting food and arguably worse so-called entertainment.
I do appreciate that things have moved on since the 1950s and ‘60s with the likes of Butlins and Pontin’s investing millions in their UK parks in recent times.
Yet there is something deeply disturbing about the concept of enforced fun under slate grey skies as Red or Blue Coats desperately attempt to keep campers happy by encouraging them to join in with every ghastly activity going.
Which is why I am deeply suspicious about a snapshot study of 2,000 people which suggested that almost three quarters are nostalgic enough to want to revisit childhood holiday destinations.
Come on – given the option between a wet week in Margate or guaranteed sun, top level service, quality food and drink and a range of contemporary entertainment you would find while cruising the Med, I know which one I would choose every time.
Ah ha, I hear you say, but taking a cruise is going to be far too expensive, so we’d rather stay at home and save our cash.
The reality is that it is possible to take a 12 or 14-night cruise for well under £60 per person, per day on a modern ship with all mod cons.
For example, Virgin Holidays Cruises is offering transatlantic crossings to or from New York on Cunard’s magnificent Queen Mary 2 this year for as little as £599. Admittedly, sunshine in the mid-Atlantic may not be guaranteed, but five-star service all the way on the six-night crossing is and the return flight is thrown in as part of the package.
If it’s a range of destinations you’re after, then a 14-night Baltics voyage taking in seven destinations on P&O Cruises’ newest superliner Ventura is being offered for £799 per person.
And come the end of this week, all the major cruise lines will be issuing their 2010 sailing programmes with special early booking discounts and other value-added offers that I confidently predict will see prices starting at less than £600 per person for seven nights at sea.
I would argue that that kind of value is virtually impossible to match for a week in the UK including all meals, entertainment and access to gym and fitness facilities, not to mention extensive facilities for children.
On the back of a washed out Easter, when two million Brits escaped abroad on holiday, there’s even more incentive for people to want to head to the sun.
One option worth considering, providing you can wait until the end of the year, is the ultimate theme park at sea – otherwise known as Oasis of the Seas, the biggest cruise ship ever built – which will begin sailing from Florida to the Caribbean in December.
The first in a series of mammoth Royal Caribbean International ships will be 40% larger than the current biggest ships afloat – such as Independence of the Seas which sails out of Southampton in the summer. Oasis will be able to carry more passengers per sailing than the capacity of the Royal Albert Hall (5,544 seats I am reliably informed) and will be one and a half times taller than the O2 Arena in London and longer than four football pitches.
Made up for seven ‘neighbourhoods,’ Oasis of the Seas promises to be like a whole range of different resorts all rolled into one.
While it certainly won’t be Hi De Hi on the high seas, Oasis and its sister ship Allure of the Seas, are set to redefine the concept of cruising by being true holiday destinations at sea.
I’ll be blogging more on Oasis of the Seas during the countdown to the ship’s launch in Miami at the end of November, so watch this space.
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